New Year New ...

Looking back at all of the posts from last year (pretentious prick alert) I just realized I haven't written any 'vibes' posts since December 2016 or something. I honestly miss experiencing books and films so intensely. Growing up means detaching myself from this dream world. I just haven't been able to 'live' in this entire aesthetic I have in my mind anymore, and it truly sucks. School and social things and a lot of other shit is taking up my spare time, which makes it harder to find the balance between my two worlds that collided last year: my dream world and my real life. 

After a year of not feeling inspired, or not experiencing things as intensely as I used to experience stuff, I finally found back the obsessive urge to create a vibe for myself to live in. I guess my mind wanted a break for a year and just figure out things in my own life. I feel like I'm now able to balance out both worlds. I'm exhilarated to finally feel the urge of excitement in my chest, the feeling of having to create something inspired by what I'm feeling like. Whether it's a diary spread, a blogpost or a photo, it makes me feel like I've accomplished something. 

I used to post 'update posts' all the time in an attempt to tell you how my life is going. That update usually goes like this:

1.  Apologizing for not posting for a while (sorry not sorry)

2. Telling you how busy I am (fake, fake, fake)

3. Talking to you about my latest series-obsession, probably some dorky show I enjoy

4. Mentioning some of the nice things I've done apart from being a couchpotato. This is usually accompanied by some selfies/pictures of my room/flatlays of materialistic junk.

5. Promising you to post more often, which we can all agree on is NOT happening any time soon.

So, now we've got that over with, let's start with a chaotic post of things and other things that remind me of those things. I am such a blogger extraordinaire, right? 

WHAT I'VE BEEN UP TO

In between all of the Avatar-marathons (I told you I was going to mention a dorky show, I never fail to disappoint) I did manage to get a few things done. I met up with friends a lot and I went shopping, but I didn't take any pictures of that because I totally just live in the moment. #yolo. Are you even a legit teen when you don't define 'hanging out with friends' as being on your phone while talking to each other about your favourite candy? 

  

I received this cool Champoin x Weekday sweater in the mail last week and I have already worn it every day. I am very delighted with this sweater because when I wear it with my new cargo pants I can finally achieve my ultimate goal. Looking like pretty much every teenage boy circa 1989, that is. My sister Laura took these pictures of me in this Champion piece of art. I love these polaroids together because the contrast between me smiling and me eating doritos is slightly comical.

 

I've been enjoying flash photography lately. I know it's a total trend right now, but it looks quite nice, and it's fitting my ~personal aesthetics~ right now. So here is a picture of my favourite layering-combo at the moment. Black turtleneck, And Other Stories x Kim Gordon sweater, gold necklace I found in a random box. I'm the person who is constantly complaining about being cold (I should really stop doing that) so wearing multiple sweaters is the way to go for me during Winter. Then again, I also complain about not wanting Winter to end because it's my favourite season. We are all made out of thousands of contradictions. In the other picture I'm wearing my favourite pajamas with some sports socks and my mom's Adidas superstars. I've considered wearing these pajamas to school numerous times, but I fear that once I wear these in public there will be no way back. The image of a 30-year old me wearing a bathrobe to work flashed through my head while considering going to school in these, and I'm not sure whether I'm ready for that yet. It's just a matter of time once I succumb to this pajama set of my dreams, though.

WHAT I'VE WATCHED/READ

My reading life has been non-existent for more than a year now. I just keep rereading the same 5 books these months. I wanted to sum these all up, but then I realized that would be boring, so just take a guess. Yesterday I got this sudden urge to start reading a lot of new books again but I have to finish a book I have to read for school before next week, so I really can't read anything new right now. Anyway, once school gets settled down a little bit I'm going to pick up my reading again. Film-wise, I've been on a roll! In the past weeks I watched Black Swan (so strong!) Everything, Everything (so lovely!), The Lobster, The Outsiders (for the 3rd time) and Face/Off (the best bad film ever). I'm going to try going to The Florida Project sometime this week, but school is stressing me out so bad right now. 

In times of stress I always tend to rely on things that comfort me, making it hard to explore new things. The past year has been one of my favourite years yet, but it's been quite busy, which made me go back to the same things in search of comfort during hectic times. I've seen every single Friends episode about 50 times, and I've read the first Harry Potter book a lot as well. Everyone has these series of books they rely on for comfort. At least, I hope so because that makes me feel less like a freak who overthinks shit like this.

I suppose this was a slightly chaotic update post. There's some stuff I'm working on for my blog, including a better layout and some vibe posts, so expect some new posts soon! (Aaah, Cato and her fake blog promises, what a joke AMIRITE?)

See u